My business requires me to deal with high amounts of people everyday. The reason I love that is because I love people. People interest me because there’s such a variety of personalities and viewpoints on life. These blogs are just my opinions on the world and how I view everything. But what fascinates me is that 2 people can see the exact same thing but have a totally different viewpoint.
The industry I am in (like any industry) has successful people and unsuccessful people. Now unlike professional athletes, the sales industry doesn’t require people to have a particular talent – but it does require people to have self belief and a high self esteem. It frustrates me when I see someone who has so much potential, but doesn’t believe in themselves. I have always wondered why people have different belief systems and confidence levels, and I believe it comes down to self esteem.
The dictionary definition of self esteem is “confidence in one’s own worth or abilities; self-respect.”
Self respect and confidence in your abilities is key to your belief systems.
I believe your self esteem is shaped from your childhood. The beliefs we are exposed to as a child is what generates a high or low self esteem. These beliefs are also reinforced by the people we are surrounded by. If we are surrounded by negative beliefs such as “You can’t do that”, “you aren’t as good as that person”, “Don’t do that”, “Be more realistic”, “you will never amount to anything” then your self-esteem will be incredibly low.
Some typical traits of a low self-esteem are:
- Doing things to win the approval of others
- Comparing ourselves to others
- Feeling like a constant failure
- Rejecting praise
- Avoiding failure
- Putting ourselves down
- Withdrawing from social events
If this blog relates to you (as it will a lot of people) – then read on. In fact, even writing this now I realised I used to have a low self-esteem – I always used to withdraw from social events, especially from groups who I didn’t know. I would’ve probably withdrawn from writing these blogs, just in case I exposed myself to criticism of bad grammar. The way I see it now is the person who is searching for the mistakes is making a massive mistake themselves because they are missing the vital points!
The big question is, how did I change that? I now have very limited fear, and I actually enjoy speaking to people I don’t know and love being part of social events.
There is one thing I have changed, and it has been mentioned in a previous blog:
THE PEOPLE I SPEND MY TIME WITH
I am now constantly surrounded by driven, highly motivated, focused, individuals but more importantly confidence builders. Over the last few years, I have been made to feel invincible (despite this not being the case). I am always in an environment where people want me to do well, where any criticism is constructive.
It is crucial to spend time with positive people – positive people find success in every area of their lives, financially, family, friends and relationships.
Success and failure aren’t anything to do with luck and bad luck, but a series of actions.
My advice is, allow yourself to be exposed to the right actions and right self-esteems so you can adopt them for yourself.
Not only will you develop a better self-esteem and lifestyle for yourself, but you will also start providing the same to other people and will increase your self-esteem exponentially.